Covid Loss

Our Covid Loss wall provides a safe space for you to grieve any loss you have suffered as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic. Whether you lost a loved one, a job, a relationship, or anything else, we're here to listen.

You can also create a beautiful Tribute Page for a loved one – where you can add messages, share memories with family and friends, and donate in memoriam by clicking here: covidaid.muchloved.org/CreateMemorial

My partner – he was my best friend

Laura, Scotland, 22nd February 2021

My partner went to bed feeling bit sleepy that was all, due to him having ulcerative colitis it was normal for him to have upset tummy.

Me & our 3 kids, aged 14, 6, and 3 all slept downstairs as was back forward to toilet, that morning of Monday 22nd February 2021 at 8.32am. I asked if he was ok. He was asking for drink as felt dehydrated, I checked his temperature, it was normal.

One hour later I went spoke to him struggling stay awake. I called the doctor and said there was something not right, checked the temperature again – was 33.3 Centigrade –  then something made me call doctor again explaining everything. They told me phone 999 so came off the phone to ambulance, shouted from other room I'm getting your bag ready you're going to hospital, my partner shouted no I'm fine.

As I walked into bedroom he took his last breath, his eyes were open. I called his name. He was gone. I remember screaming for help. My daughter came into the room she was only 14, I told her get help while I did CPR. My old child tried CPR & my neighbours tried. Within 10 mins the ambulance was there and they told me they couldn't save him. It was the worst day of my life.

Kathleen Thompson, my mum

Janis, Portrush, 31st October 2020

Mum, myself, and my husband were all admitted to hospital with Covid in October 2020. I almost lost my husband. I never saw my mum again.

My husband

Terrina A Hughes, Birmingham, 13/11/21

My husband of 27 years Stephen Arthur llewelyn Hughes passed away on the 13/11/21 from Covid 19.

I couldn't visit or see him, I never got to say goodbye and how much I loved him 😢 I have now been diagnosed with breast cancer and trying to grieve and fight my cancer is so hard, I feel as if I'm in a battle but all I can hope is things will get better.

My Dad - Peter Godfrey Davies

Beverley Davies, England, 28/09/2020

My wonderful dad passed away from Covid-19 on 28/09/2020. He had been admitted to hospital two weeks prior with a water infection and we had fully expected him to be home within a few days. Sadly he caught Covid and the next time we saw him was the day he left us. Yes, my mum and I were lucky enough to be with him as he passed, albeit barely recognisable in full PPE. My dad was still talking when we arrived and his first words to us were 'where have you been?'

My life was shattered. My dad was my rock and nothing will ever convince me that it was his time to go. I think maybe that's the hardest thing to love with. I feel strongly now that I'm my dad's 'representative'. I'm trying to make him proud but I will miss him till the day I am gone. Miss you dad and love you always. XxX

My mummy ,the Queen of our family

Janie mccune, Belfast, 2nd February 2021

Mummy died with covid and we are still devastated, she was our Queen, we miss her so much.

I cry all the time ,she is a great loss to her five children, 10 grandchildren, and 16 great grandchildren who all loved her so much. Mummy was my inspiration and always will be loved and much missed 💔💔

My Dad and my sense of self

Sally Anne G-Adams, St Albans, 8.2.21

My Dad died of Covid on Feb 8th, 2021, after bravely fighting for 26 days in hospital. I caught Covid from him and was in an isolation ward in the same building as Dad: I was released a week before he died.

I was too weak to visit him to say goodbye, and could barely speak due to the impact of Covid pneumonia and pleurisy, so phone conversations were brief. I don’t remember much of that time, or the three months after, but my brief flashback memories of that Covid ward, of the suffering I heard, are strong and painful.

That experience, plus losing my Dad to the same disease, caused Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I want me back. I want to feel safe again. I want to remember what ‘happy’ feels like. I’m determined to get there. I’ve just started trauma therapy & I feel more confident now that I can find peace again. I am forever changed, as we all are, by my family’s experiences with Covid, and I accept that. But I look forward to feeling safe and content again.

Both Parents

Julieann Edwards, West midlands, November 2020

So 2020 was when my life changed forever.

My Dad passed away on the 10th November followed by my Mom on the 18th November 8 days apart 💔 both from covid my heart was broken into a thousand pieces and my life will never be the same again

God bless my Mom & Dad I will love you forever

My wonderful husband

Margaret Winfrow, Sheffield, 18th April

My Brian had a fall resulting in being taken to hospital with a broken hip and arm. He had been fit and healthy.

I kept getting mixed messages about his progress. I was refused to speak to him, as it would have been their phone. I pleaded with them and offered to buy one. He had delirium due to anaesthetic and my voice would have helped. He died alone. He acquired Covid in hospital on 6th April 2020.

My heart is broken.

I lost my walking.

Alec, Edinburgh, 19 March 2020

I can't reach the bus-stop. My daily walk is 150m. In one way I lost 'The World', though I can still find my way in through the imagination.

Lost mam and brother

Mrs Susan Eldridge, Durham, January 2021

My mam got Covid last year. Mam only lasted the night. Mam was 90 and she was amazing.

Nine days after my brother sadly passed away with Covid. That was heartbreaking. My Mam was named Doris, my brother Arthur, it was very hard as when my brother was told he was dying he said my mam and him could have a double funeral. I would look after them again. I miss them so much xxxx

The life of our family -The light of my life

Karen - in memory of my wonderful husband, Volney, North East England, October 2021

My wonderful husband of 41 years was snatched away from me at age 66 -much too early. He had just started thinking about retirement from his work as a life celebrant and we were looking forward to spending perhaps 20-25 more years together. Quality time, now our family have all grown and flown. We are devastated beyond words and still can't fully accept that he has gone... I'm broken in pieces. So much pain and heartache.

He couldn't cope with the suffocation that came with using CPAP and then he died while in a medically induced coma after 4 weeks on a ventilator. We did not get to say good bye. I did not get to hold his hand and offer comfort while he struggled. He needed me with him for comfort. They denied us that. Horrendous... My daughter made this video with her family.

My Pops - Let Me Go, God Bless!

Louise, Berkshire, England, 12 December 2021

They were my pops (Dad) final words he spoke to my mum and I…………Let Me Go, God Bless! He could no longer cope with the masks and the feeling of suffocating. One day he was eating fruit which we chopped up for him to have when we visited. The next day we were saying our goodbyes.

He fought and he battled until he could bear no more. He was just about to start retirement with my mum and in the blink of an eye he was being taken away from us, never expected and so sudden. It’s unimaginable and doesn’t feel real. We miss you so much, our forever rock and our forever hero for trying to keep with us xx💙xx

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